You and your family may have decided that a move to assisted living is the right next step for your loved one.
You may have chosen a community that feels like a good fit. You may feel relieved they're receiving the care they need but still worry about how they'll adjust.
Settling into a new home takes time, and the first days and weeks can bring mixed emotions as your loved one gets used to new surroundings, routines, and people. During this first month, as you observe your loved one's transition to assisted living, you may hope to see them making friends or participating in activities. But the truth is, they may need more time to adjust or prefer to be less social at first. It’s important to let them discover what feels right for them.
Here are some assisted living transition tips to help you navigate those first days, weeks, and months while respecting your loved one's preferences and allowing them to decide how and when they want to engage with their new community.
After moving to assisted living, your loved one may need some time to develop new routines and relationships.
Familiar belongings and keepsakes can help your loved one feel more at home in their new assisted living apartment.
By the end of the first month, look for signs that your loved one is becoming more comfortable, rather than measuring their adjustment by how much they participate.
If you have concerns about your loved one's adjustment, talk with the care team.
The First Few Days: Expect Some Ups and Downs
The First Week: Making a New Space Feel Like Home
Weeks Two and Three: Getting to Know the Community
By Day 30: Look for Small Signs of Settling
In The First Few Months: Finding a New Routine
When Should You Talk to the Care Team?
The Birches: Begin Your Loved One's Next Chapter
The first few days after an assisted living move can feel very strange. While adjusting to their new home, your loved one may be experiencing unfamiliar sounds, schedules, faces, and routines all at once.
These experiences are common during the first 30 days in assisted living. It’s natural if your loved one’s sleep is affected, if they miss their old home, or if they feel hesitant to participate in activities at first. To ease the adjustment, remind your loved one that it can take to adjust and that it is ok to take their time if they wish. Regular visits during the first few days can provide just the sense of comfort and security your loved one needs to feel ready to explore the community and meet new people.
One of the easiest ways to make an assisted living apartment feel more familiar during your loved one’s first week is to bring familiar pieces of home with you. Their favorite photographs, books, blankets, artwork, lamps, or furniture pieces can all help make a new space feel more personal. If possible, involve your loved one in deciding what belongings come with them and where to place them in their new home.
The first week is also a good time to start exploring what meals, activities, and common spaces are available. During your visits, you can spend time together in different areas and help your loved one begin developing a routine that feels comfortable.
At The Birches senior living community in Clarendon Hills, Illinois, our Gold Credentialed Montessori approach encourages Members to take ownership of their routines and make independent decisions about how they spend their day. This approach helps our Members feel empowered and gives them a sense of purpose and independence.
As the first couple of weeks pass, your loved one may begin seeing familiar faces and getting to know community team members or neighbors they recognize from activities. They may also begin developing a daily routine that feels good to them. Morning might include enjoying coffee in their apartment or joining neighbors for breakfast, while evening might mean dinner with friends or winding down with a favorite book or TV show. At The Birches, Members have opportunities to shape their days around their own interests and routines, whether that means participating in an activity, spending time with neighbors, or enjoying quiet time on their own.
Weeks two and three are also a good time for family members to get to know the team. Sharing information about your loved one, such as their favorite hobbies or discussion topics, can help team members get to know them and make powerful connections.
During the first month of assisted living, your loved one may not feel completely settled in. But that’s ok. When considering what to expect after an assisted living move, look for small signs that your loved one is becoming more comfortable. For example, do they know a few team members by name? Maybe they have a favorite place to sit or an activity they enjoy. At The Birches, Members have many ways to stay engaged, whether that’s participating in a game or book club, attending a fitness class, spending time gardening, participating in a discussion group, or contributing to a committee.
Keep in mind that settling in does not have to mean becoming highly social or participating in every available activity! Your loved one may feel most at home with a few familiar faces and occasional participation in community activities. And that can be enough.
Adjusting to senior living takes time, and your loved one may need more than 30 days to feel at home. As they grow more familiar with their new community, their interests and preferences may evolve as they develop new routines and learn what the community has to offer.
If you have concerns about their adjustment, keep checking in with your loved one about how they’re feeling and what’s working for them. If they’re still having difficulty settling in, talk with the community team about ways to support them while respecting their independence.
Every person's adjustment will look different, and there isn't a single timeline for feeling at home in assisted living. However, ongoing changes in your loved one's mood or daily habits may warrant a conversation with the care team.
If your loved one remains withdrawn, seems persistently sad, loses interest in activities they previously enjoyed, experiences significant changes in appetite or weight, or continues to struggle with the transition, ask the care team how they can help. You can also discuss ways to encourage community involvement or whether changes to their care plan might make sense.
At The Birches, our senior living community in Clarendon Hills, Illinois, we offer assisted living and memory care designed to help older adults stay connected and engaged. We believe senior living should offer opportunities to build close relationships and pursue what gives each person a sense of purpose, from day 1 through day 30 and into the months that follow.
If you're exploring assisted living for an aging parent or other loved one, download our free Navigating Assisted Living Guide to help you think through what's next.
When you're ready, contact one of our community advisors and schedule a visit. We'd be happy to help you explore your options and discover whether The Birches could be the right fit for your loved one.